Granny receives a box from Cousin Pearl in the hills. One of the items in the box is an old fashioned crank telephone. Granny asks Jethro to hook it up to a party line on the pole so she can listen in on the party line.

Granny despairs of Elly Mae ever finding a husband and decides to promote her non-existent cooking skills. She is entered into a TV show cook-off, but nothing she fixes is edible.

Jethro is in love with Susie, the carhop waitress at the local drive-in, but Susie keeps rejecting his advances. Jed advises a dejected Jethro to take dating advice from Dash Riprock, the movie star/playboy neighbor to the Clampetts. Dash advises Jethro to buy a convertible, invite Susie to go on a double date with Elly Mae and him, and even lets Jethro use his bachelor pad. Despite Dash's efforts, Jethro still can't get past his hillbilly ways to Susie's heart.

A con artist pretends to be someone from back home and stays with the Clampetts. She plans to get photos of Jed in a compromising position in order to blackmail him.

Jethro decides to sophisticate Emaline but she has bigger plans for blackmailing Mr. Drysdale with her cuckoo clock camera. The colonel continues to woo Granny. The two swindlers though haven't met someone as sharp as Jed.

Jethro is chopping wood while a chimpanzee named May Bell watches. He wishes that he could teach May Bell to chop wood. When Elly May comes by, she and Jethro talk and decide that they want a gorilla.

The Clampetts miss Herbie and ask Mr. Drysdale to get the tame gorilla back. The banker promises to help but actually hinders the effort.

Granny's soap making sends noxious smoke into the air, which gets the attention of smog commissioner Tinsley. He shuts down the operation and Jed decides to run against him when he misunderstands Mr. Drysdale's advice.

Granny wins free lessons from a supposedly acclaimed dance school.

Jed takes a job on the board of directors of O.K. Oil Company.

Cushing makes another attempt to get the Clampetts to move their money to his bank by romancing Granny. When Drysdale learns of this, he decides to bring his father-in-law Lowell Farquhar, who had once dated Granny, to draw Granny away from Cushing.

Gloria Swanson and Drysdale are doing some business which involves her selling her house and some of her possessions and donating the proceeds to charity and then she is moving East. When the Clampetts read about her moving away, Jethro who heard the story that she's auctioning off her things, thinks that she's broke and that she's being forced to sell her possessions. Granny being a big fan is heart broken. They go to see her and try to lift up her spirits by saying they like her movies and that they're still being shown in their hometown. Jed decides to ask Chapman, who runs his movie studio, to make a silent movie with Swanson in it.

Jethro is so desperate to meet a woman that when Miss Hathaway's bird-watching group arrives, he goes out of his way to try to impress one of the pretty birdwatchers.

Flatt and Scruggs are visiting to film a TV commercial for a detergent. Commodore Ratterman thinks the Clampett authenticity would help sell the soap. He doesn't count on their honesty or Jethro's incompetence as a director.

In order to buy Mrs. Drysdale a special Christmas present, the Clampetts take seasonal jobs in a department store.

Granny discovers Martians next door at the Drysdale mansion.

Amos Wentworth Hogg, Mayor of Bug Tussle, travels to Beverly Hills to visit the Clampetts with hopes of raising money to cover an embezzlement debt. The Clampetts, however, believe he has eyes for Granny.

Granny decides to take her share of the Clampett millions and move back home.

Jed and Granny decide to donate the burden of their millions to some college students and move back home.

When Crowfoot Indians come to Beverly Hills to discuss a boundary dispute at the Clampett oil field, Granny prepares for war.

Jethro goes to a computer dating service, and Granny follows to find a date for Jed.

After reading the Society page Granny decides to best way to get Elly a husband is to throw her a coming out party, complete with possum burgers and gopher gravy. Mrs. Drysdale, hoping to forever humiliate them, is all too happy to help.

Jethro learns about bullfighting and decides bring a matador would be a perfect job. El Magnifico is to teach him but then he meets Ellie Mae and wants to marry the Clampett heiress. Her concern is for the bulls.

The Clampetts come across Narda and Yerko, two gypsies, who decide to run a scam on the unsuspecting clan. Involving both a marriage prophecy and and a curse, the crooks see the families 's naivety to their advantage.

The Clampetts are visited by a real king, Alexander so Granny and Mrs. Drysdale start matchmaking. The broke royal needs a wealthy bride and courts Ellie. Drysdale niece Doreen is tricked by a costumed Jethro and ends up unimpressed.

The Drysdales have temporary custody of a baby hippo and when Granny spots it she thinks it's a giant hog. She makes plans for turning into future meals while Ellie sees it as another pet.

Granny continues her doctoring and is especially pleased with her new batch of tonic. Dr. Clyburn is determined to get her to stop so invites her to his office to show her how modern medicine works. Granny has other ideas.

Country music legends Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs visit the Clampetts while Lester's "citified" wife, Gladys, heads to Mammoth Studios for a screen test directed by Jethro (at Lester's request).

The Clampetts agree to watch their banker's nephew Milby but they don't know he's spoiled rotten. His behavior tests the patience of all, especially Granny who has a few ideas on teaching him manners.

Mrs. Drysdale's dahlias spark a feud with the Clampett's when Margaret Drysdale accuses Granny of theft.